Next Monday, I graduate from my treatment program. By then, eight weeks will have passed, two of which I met with friends and counselors from 9-4 during the day and from 5:30-8:30 Monday through Thursday for six weeks. It feels good to be close to the finish line, understanding full-well that’s there really no finish line. I’ll close this chapter of my recovery (though I’ll continue meeting for after-care from 5:30-6:30 every Monday evening) and I’ll be on my own, relatively speaking.
I’ve started building up my support team. It’s a slow process, but I’m doing it. Making phone calls gets easier every time I do it; I continue to draw a lot of comfort from AA meetings, and I’ve found two that I really like.
But after next Monday, life returns to normal, or what passes for normal these days with me. I’ll be home to make dinner, and my wife won’t have to rush home from work so I can make it to rehab by 5:30. I’ll be able to help bathe the kids, get them settled, help with homework, and hopefully have time to work on writing and to record some music.
I know it’s going to be tough, but I can do it. I’ve made it 51 days without a drop of alcohol, and I never thought I’d have the strength to do that. Who knows what feats I’m capable of now that I’m clean and sober? I’m ready to find out.
I realize that I can say that because I’m having a good day. My brain is currently being my friend rather than my enemy. I’m sure I’ll trip and tumble downhill at some point, but I won’t remain down there in the dirt and shadows…not that I know now how to pick myself up and ask for help walking back up.
Sending prayers, positive thoughts, and good vibes to my recovering alcoholic brothers and sisters out there. I leave you with this, as much for myself as for you: